Nuff' said.

Just to reiterate... Just because you have an expensive camera and an adorable blog/website with all the really, really cute kids/people you have taken pictures of and you even made the pictures ohsocute by turning up the contrast really high or clicking the sepia button... Does not make you a photographer. Not even if you got an A+ in your high school photography class.

This, my friends, is called a hobby.

Just watch this...

It's a bit long, but very... educational I guess you could say. I am honestly in a bit of shock after watching this. I think you may have to have a youtube account to watch it, but I think everyone should.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5rXPrfnU3G0&feature=player_embedded&has_verified=1

Something needs to change when soldiers are begging to kill people and laughing about it.

Ignorance.

My friend Bob posted an anti-Obama facebook status: "O.B.A.M.A ... One Big Ass Mistake America!!! Huhuhuhuhuhu!!!". Although I am pretty sure my dear friend Bob knows little to nothing about politics, he is still entitled to his opinion. But this douche bag decided to chime in with this comment: "i agree.... o.b.a.m.a. free the slaves and now they rule over us...imagine that" And some other Douche bag had the audacity to like this comment. Hello? Could he be any more racist? Like slavery is something to joke about? What is wrong with people? I guess I forgot how ignorant people still are in 2010. It is so sad and pathetic. I don't care if you agree with Obama's policies, but it is a SHAME that you are implying that it was a mistake to abolish slavery. 


So Congratulations. You are proof satan exists. 

UPDATE: This young, gentlemen has since apologized. It takes a lot to admit fault, and I admire him for doing so. Let us all, including me, learn to think before we speak/type. 

2010 Most annoying female singer goes to...

KATY PERRY

I know I'm not alone in my antipathy for Ms. Perry. Or is it Mrs? Who cares. I know I am not alone.

It's not just her obnoxious, poorly written, bubbly in all the wrong ways omgiamstillinmiddleschool songs that make me cringe, but add her atrocious, iwilldoanythingforattention "fashion" style and you get the creature that is Katy Perry. You would think with as much money as she has maybe the people working for her would let her know how ridiculous she looks all the time. But we all know, money doesn't buy you class. Obviously.  

Please enjoy the following images as it was difficult for me to eliminate so many other worthy pictures.  

So cheers to KP!

Runner up: Taylor Swift.

Tumor Removed.

A tumor is an invasive and abnormal organic mass that serves no purpose, except to harm and leach sustenance from its host.

Funny how some humans share the exact characteristics as a tumor. But luckily, like a tumor, they can be removed.  Sometimes they even remove themselves. BONUS!  

Because my nephews are the cutest!

VOTE FOR THEM FOR THE GAP CASTING CALL.

PLEASE!

 
Cohen age 3:
http://www.gapcastingcall.com/GapCastingCall/EntryDetail.html?id=668533

Holden age 5 months:
http://www.gapcastingcall.com/GapCastingCall/EntryDetail.html?id=665866

Day 1: Paprika Anne Hubbell

The story: I was on my way to my cousins when I almost ran over a bird. I looked in my rear-view-mirror and realized it was a baby bird, and it was in the middle of the road flopping around helplessly. For you who know me, know I am a bleeding heart, especially when it comes to animals. So I made a U-turn and parked my car in the middle of the road. I scooped up the bird and put it on my passenger chair. I checked all near-by trees and saw no signs of a nest. Surely I couldn't leave it there to die. 

My cousin and I made a nice home and named the bird Paprika Anne. Pappy is quite lively and loves to swim. I put one of our turtles heating lamps into her new home aka Pimptress-Palace and she loves it! Pappy has yet to eat, but drinks a lot and has had two BM's. Kory tried to hand feed her like a mother bird... but she still refused. Stubborn. We will work on the eating part.

I love Pappy so much :) and so do her brothers. They love to sniff Pappy, and are so gentle. Stay tuned!

Catheter? Yes, PLEASE!

TMI? Probably. 

I am over having the worlds.lamest.bladder. If my bladder were a puppy, it would have been put to sleep long ago. I feel like an 87 year old pregnant woman jumping on a trampoline. 

Does anyone else have this problem? 

As soon as the "pee pee" urge comes, I had better find a restroom or else I am toast. The soiled kind of toast. The kind of toast you spread way too much butter on and is too soggy to eat. When I drink 32oz it equals a minimum of four bathroom visits in about an 1.5 hour period. No joke. I should probably supply my own toilet paper at work. I still rarely go an entire night without getting up at least once to go to the bathroom. I have never successfully gotten into a shower, pool, body of water without having to first relieve my bladder. My little brother once tickled me until I pee'd my pants, without much effort.

 Alas, this has been a life-long battle and I have avoided most accidents (with trial and much error)

Sometimes a catheter doesn't sound so bad. I think I could rock the catheter look. Maybe I'd let people sign my pee-pee bag. Too far? Oh well.

Love always, S. 

It's not me, It's you...

Preface: These are just a few things that make me cringe. But no amount of cringing will make me stop loving you. So please don't take offense or change one bit.

Besos for all.

The bands Kings of Leon, John Mayer, Taylor Swift and any male singer from American idol. Oh, and The show American idol.

Receiving a text/email/any sort of communication with huge spelling errors. For example, " Hey Shar. Wut R U Doin 2day." Okay, that was a bit exaggerated, but you get my point. Yes, I do judge you for this.

Slow drivers.

Mickey Mouse/Disneyland anything. Vomit.

Females who wear make-up to the gym. Really?

People who don't love my dogs as much as I do. Shame on you.

Whoever thought up Trunk-or-treats on Halloween. Kids need to walk before eating all that candy. Hello obesity.

Television. I hate you. I am so glad I am over you for good.

Lowbook sales radio commercials. How dare you change the lyrics to popular songs. You get my hopes up way too often, only to crush them with your lame attempts to be funny. Die.

People who hate Utah. PLEASE LEAVE.

In closing, I will leave you with one of my most recent clothing FAIL. Enjoy.

Made with Love!

THANK YOU SO MUCH!

I received so many donations. I have the best family and friends in the world. Truly. I love you all. 

These are just a few of the donations.

Because I have been given much, I too must give.

I am putting together humanitarian hygiene kits to be sent to orphanages, shelters, and medical facilities in Haiti.  A lady from my church has a son who is traveling there and will deliver them. As I am sure for many of you, like me, money is tight, but every little thing truly helps. If you can donate any supplies I will finish off the kits! I am going to make as many as I possibly can! 

Kit Instructions: 

Place the following items in a heavy-duty, one-gallon sealable bag. Remove as much air as possible. 

- 2 unbreakable combs without sharp handles

- 4 toothbrushes ( sealed )

- 1 tube of toothpaste ( 6-8 ounces, No pumps )

- 2 bars of soap ( 3.5-5 ounces each )

- 2 hand towels ( approximately 15x25 inches )

* Please no dishtowels or washcloths. 

Let me know if you can donate any of these items! 

God bless. 

62 Days until...

My boyfriend T.I. gets out of jail.

Let us all celebrate March 28 2010! 

Surrounded by a buncha fatties.

I am putting the family on a diet!

 Thanks to my not-so-good friend depression I was able to lose all the weight I wanted... it's been keeping it off that is hard. I want to stay my pre-high school weight SO I put myself on a lean cuisine diet. It is working wonders. I work right by the Stouffers thrift store so I just pick up a few lunches for the week. Because it's a thrift store they are especially cheap = more money for me!

 My dogs ( my beagle ) has gotten pretty plump so I picked up some light dog food. Xander hates it. I mixed their light food with some of their old fatty food and Xander picked through his entire bowl of food and ate all the fatty pieces and left me a mess of light dog food. What a smart boy. I love my pups so much!

I found this delightful art at D.I.

"Come here Jimmy, be a good boy and give daddy a goodnight kiss."

Sally exclaimed, "Me next Daddy!"

Not creepy at all.

Ian Clift Carter = Not Satanic.

Happy Day of Birth Ian.

Ian and I have been besties since infancy. Okay, that is a lie... my mom made me invite him to my birthday parties. Pity invite. We were born and raised a block away from each other and became inseparable on his sweet 16. I was inspired to bring him a goldfish, and it was all bubbles from there ( muhaha. so cheesy ) I just love this kid. We have been through it all. Truly. My best memories are with Ian.

Ian's qualities: Amazing Photographer. Cannot grow facial hair. Is un-dunkable in a swimming pool. God-Father to my dogs. Can wrap a gift better than Martha Stewart.

Defects: Has a model mullet. Lives in LA. Bad at naming pets. Loves Wal-Mart AND IHOP.

Satan is the CEO of golds gym....

Yes, I purposely did not capitalize golds gym because they are not worthy of such luxury. I freaking hate golds gym. I always heard horror stories of trying to quit this gym, but I never expected them to be so evil. My two years were up ( Thank goodness ) and so I assumed since I hadn't renewed my membership surely they wouldn't go ahead and charge me a "membership fee" and also my monthly payment. But they did and there was nothing I could do about it. Also, they make you write them a letter explaining why you want to quit their gym.... so I did. Enjoy.


I should have included: I am NOT sorry for that one time I peed in your hot tub, or the several times I did not disinfect the machines after using them. Now I wish I would have spit in your drinking fountain.

I almost pee'd my pants today...

No joke.

I had 64 ounces of diet coke ( gross, I am not proud of this) and had only one pee after this atrocious amount of substance was in my body. My job requires me to be in a vehicle for long amounts of time, and I really cannot stop to pee at my leisure. Problem. Huge problem. When I finally was able to stop at a sketch gas station ( at this point my top button was already unbuttoned) I run inside and dart for the bathroom only to read a huge sign " Ask attendant for key" Seriously... an effing key to pee? So, I find the worker girl and she tells me that someone is already in the bathroom. FML. I seriously paced around that damn sinclair station for several minutes thinking of what I would say to my boss when I call her and tell her I have to run home to get new pants BECAUSE I'VE PEE'D MINE! I almost ran across state street when a girl finally comes out of the bathroom at which point I think " I wonder if the reason she was in there so long was because she took a large.. dump." Is this TMI? Oh well. I grab the key from her then OCD germ Sharon kicks in and I hesitate to touch the disgusting key which is attached to a plastic soda lid. GERMS anyone? Like they actually disinfect it. But I was desperate. Relief. After I washed my hands I rolled up a large piece of paper towel to carry the infected key back to the desk.... and proceeded sanitized my hands with my sanitizer in my purse.

Why do some gas stations still use this method?

Just when you thought I couldn't be more well-rounded...

My amazing friends and I have crafttastic nights and here are some things I have made. Besides the store bought shirt... pretty much everything is made from scratch. On the awesome list we have: Crochet Headband, Elastic Belt, Life-size photo of man taking photo, Argyle plate ( get over it, I know it's upside down ), Rasta-Peace spraypaint shirt, Mod Podge Wallet, Xanders dog collar, Moccasins, My phone cover and Lightswitch cover. These are a few of my hand-made things.

Why do people cheat?

DOUCHE

What a douche Tiger is. Same with all the cheaters out there. Of course he is "sorry" and wants to be a good husband and father... after he is caught. Isn't that always the case. When are men going to learn? The grass is never greener on the other side. Chasing after lust will get you NO WHERE. It's just sad that men have to learn it the hard way, and the poor women suffer all the consequences of their idiocy.

WHORE

I am not excluding woman from this. Jaimee Grubbs knew Tiger was married, she didn't care. It is sad when a woman does this. Especially when the woman is a mother. Shame on you. You should not have kids. Please stop.

Why is it that the women men decided to cheat with are always so much uglier than their wife... why is this men? Probably because the only girls trashy enough to cheat are just this... trashy.

Tis' the Season...

Found in the Provo Quiznos.I had to be extra sneaky taking this one.

Stay Classy this Holiday Season!

Also, I want to share my favorite time wasters!
First up: Seriouslysoblessed.blogspot.com for all you Mormon mommies who are perfect wives, have perfect lives, and perfect kids. (Vomit)

Second: www.stuffwhitepeoplelike.com. to see just how white you really are!

Enjoy with some hot cocoa. Store bought of course, who do you think I am?